Thursday, December 11, 2008

Retrieval day

Today was egg retrieval day. We went up to Spokane this morning; it was nice having someone else in the car to talk to. We got there by 7:45am for Bobby's appointment. This is almost the end of the series, so there weren't many people waiting, I think only 2 couples. They called Bobby back and when he was done we had about 1 hour before my appointment so we ran and got breakfast for Bobby (nothing for me since I wasn't allowed to eat or drink).

We went back to the office for my appointment and they took us right back. Bobby was allowed in the room while I changed and waited but then he had to go out to the waiting room. They don't let husbands in because it is a sterile operating environment. Anyway, the IV guy came in and hemmed and hahhed about my veins. Finally he picked my right hand and got the IV in, but he seemed hesistant about it. I asked him about 10 times if he was sure it was in and he said he was, but he wasn't too believable (or maybe I am just paranoid).

I went in for the procedure, laughing and joking with the nurses along the way. As I was falling asleep I think I asked if they could turn the music station to Christmas music - I'm weird.
The procedure took about 30 minutes and when I woke up in recovery they were putting a warm blanket on me and Bobby was by my side. My nurse said the first thing I did when they woke me up was to throw my arm in the air and declare that "yes, in fact my iv did stay in the entire time". Ha! The things you say when you are all doped up.

I had to stay in the recovery room for about 1/2 hour and then we were able to leave. As we were waiting they told us they were able to retrieve 34 eggs!!! Woo hoo, go ovaries. We will have to wait until tomorrow to know if any of those eggs were mature and if they were mature, how many were able to fertilize. I feel good...I mean 34 eggs has to give me better odds than 12, right?

I know that this will sound weird, but it never actually occurred to me that we might actually get pregnant after I heard about the fibroid. But then I heard the number of eggs that we had and I found myself feeling hopeful and excited :-)

Let's hope tonight goes well for my little eggs, and I will update tomorrow with the number of embryos we have. I really don't like this part of the process...it is a waiting game and I am the worlds most impatient person.

Till tomorrow...

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Freedom!

Today is my one day of freedom from shots! I am practically giddy, or as Bobby so eloquently put it...I'm acting like I'm on crack.

The HCG shot went great last night. God Bless Bobby because he is probably the best "shot giver" ever. He really missed his calling. The needle is large, and when I say large I mean like an inch and a half. Yikes! We both kind of dozed in front of the TV as we waited for the time to come to give the shot. I set my alarm on my cell phone so we wouldn't sleep through it. When the alarm went off, I darted off the couch and ran to the bathroom, all ready to mix and shoot. I had forgotten one thing.....Bobby. So I ran back to the living room and woke him up and he sauntered down the hall to our bedroom still half asleep.

I mixed the shot according to my instructions and damn I was fast. Too fast. We ended up having to wait 10 minutes to give the actual shot. 10 minutes seems like an eternity when you are waiting for something and you are ready to go to bed because you know that you have to get up 5 hours later.

Finally 11pm arrived - hooray! We marked the spot so Bobby would have something to aim at (men, I swear) and I iced the area for a minute to help ward off some of the sting I thought was coming. I leaned on the counter a bit, and bent my leg on the side I was to receive the shot - it's funny how fast these things come back to you. And I waited and waited and finally I hear Bobby say, "OK, let's go to bed".

I was like, Uh, excuse me...could you please give me the shot already. But the funny thing is, he had given me the shot and I didn't feel a thing. Now, let me tell you, he was always this good at giving the shot the first round. I bragged to everyone how wonderful he was. But I kind of thought he was out of practice and I was in for at least one bad shot before he remembered how to do it. Thank goodness that wasn't the case.

I went to Spokane today and had blood work and ultrasound. I got the call from my nurse and everything looks great. She sounded really positive. She went over my instructions for tomorrow, although she didn't really need to because I read over them so many times I think they are burned into my brain. Tonight will be simple: light dinner, no dairy, nothing to eat or drink after midnight. Tomorrow: shower, and put on loose clothing, also: no deodorant, lotion, or anything with a scent because apparently the eggs do not like scents (this is actually one of the reasons they give, haha).

We are off to Spokane in the morning, and by tomorrow night (if all goes well) we will have some little embryos incubating!

I will write tomorrow when I get back. Thanks for all the positive comments and thoughts sent my way - it is wonderful to have such a great support system.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Trigger

Tonight is the trigger shot - aka my HCG shot! I went to my appointment today in Spokane, and let me tell ya, I am tired of driving that drive. The Dr. asked if I thought my ovaries were ready and I said "yes, I really think they are". He looked at my follicles and said that indeed I was ready and that I "must really know" my ovaries. I laughed and joked that we were old friends. Really what I wanted to say was that, "how could they not be ready? They feel like 2 cantaloupes playing pinball with my internal organs"!

So, I left and still had to wait for confirmation from my nurse. I just talked to her on the phone and she gave me my instructions. Tonight I am not supposed to take my Follistum, Menopur, or Lupron - woo hoo, no tummy shots! I will, instead, take my HCG shot. This shot is given in the backside, kind of above the tushie and near the hip area. It is completely impossible to reach which is why Bobby gives me this shot. The HCG shot basically "triggers" ovulation. They give you an exact time to give the shot because ovulation occurs 39 - 42 hours after the shot is given and this is how they know when to do the retrieval.

The time they assigned me to give the HCG shot is 11pm. Thank goodness! I know some people that have to give it at 2am and I was praying that wouldn't be us. We are actually on the same schedule as the first round, so this feels familiar.

So, we mix the shot at 10:45 pm to make sure we give ourselves plenty of time. Then we give the shot at 11pm. Then I go back in tomorrow for blood work and ultrasound (I think to make sure that my body hasn't decided to ovulate on it's own - scary). Then tomorrow night is the "glorious" night. I call it "glorious" because it is my only night without ANY shots. This is wonderful since I am on my 23rd day of shots and it is no fun at all. Also, once they retrieve my eggs, Bobby has to give me a progesterone shot (in the same area as the HCG) until we know if this round was successful. And if it is successful I can look forward to that progesterone shot everyday for 8 weeks. Whew!

Thursday is egg retrieval day. I'm not really too nervous about it - it is a simple outpatient procedure. They give you anesthesia, so I will get a good nap. Thursday is also Bobby's "big moment". He finally gets to "contribute" to the process - ha ha! We go in at 7:45am for Bobby's part and then back in at 9am for me. My procedure isn't until 10am, but they have to do some prep like putting the IV in, and signing various paperwork, etc, etc.

Think good thoughts for me around 10am on Thursday - the last round they were able to retrieve 12 eggs, but only 6 were mature enough to be fertilized. Let's hope we have some better results this time around.

More later....

Monday, December 8, 2008

Better Spirits

I am feeling a lot better about the whole fibroid thing today. I went to my dr. appointment in Spokane this morning, and when I walked into my ultrasound I told the Dr. that this fibroid thing was freaking me out. I wanted to know where it was located and how big it was. He said it wasn't too big and it wasn't growing so we didn't need to be concerned about it at this time. But if this round doesn't result in a pregnancy we will have to do a hysteroscopy or laporoscopy to remove it before we go to the next round. This conversation made me feel mildly better and I didn't feel the need to cry the entire 2 hour drive home.

When I got home I was exhausted! Connor (my 2 year old) has been a little sick and decided that he had to sleep in our bed last night at 2am. There was no talking him out of it, and frankly I was too tired to argue, so I gave in and let him sleep in our bed. Unfortunately for me, sleeping in our bed means cuddling with Bobby and kicking me, so I didn't get much sleep.

My nurse didn't call until nearly 3 pm, for a minute I thought maybe I had fallen through the cracks and was forgotten. When she called she told me to stop my Follistum and Menopur, and to only take 5 units of Lupron this evening. Then back up to Spokane tomorrow morning for another blood draw and ultrasound. My follicles are the right size, but they want to give my eggs another day to try to get them mature. Things are looking good in that area!

I did ask Karen (my nurse) about the fibroid. I told her what Dr. Robins said and that I wasn't sure if he was giving me all of the info and that I wanted her to tell me how bad it really was. She totally put my mind at ease. She told me that the Dr. is very cautious when it comes to this and would never do anything to harm the embryos or go forward with a cycle if it was doomed for failure. She also said that if anything, they will retrieve my eggs, fertilize them and then freeze them. That way we don't waste this round and we will be able to implant them at a later date when we have removed the fibroid. So that is worst case scenario - but it looks like (at this point) that we will probably give my HCG shot (the shot that makes you ovulate) tomorrow night and then have retrieval on Thursday.

I am super excited about only having to give one shot tonight and just feel soooo much better about it all. There is still that thing in the back of the mind that knows there are still so many things that can happen. But at this point I am happy that we are moving forward and things are looking relatively good.

More tomorrow~

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Bump in the road

I had a dr. appointment this morning - blood work and ultrasound. Everything was going along fine, until I heard my doctor sigh as he was giving me the ultrasound. Then he said that I had a fibroid. Ugh! He said that I didn't have it during the last ultrasound in my last round, so it has grown since then. I had a hysterscope to remove polyps and clean out my uterus, so this is especially frustrating. I am trying to stay positive and not read too much into things.

I'm supposed to stay on my meds (same dosages) and go back in on Monday. At that time I am hoping to get more information. But it looked pretty big when I saw it on the ultrasound and I was reading online (which I promised myself I wouldn't do because I always freak myself out) and most everything I read was doom and gloom. Fibroids can cause an embryo to not implant, or if it does implant then it often causes miscarriage, and if by luck a pregnancy does result it is rare that the baby is carried to term and in most cases has to be delivered by c-section. See? Doom and Gloom!

It doesn't help that I am tired and really emotional. Bobby is obviously disappointed and since we don't really know what is going on we are both feeling crabby about the whole thing. What if they decide that we can't continue? Does this count as our second round? What if we do continue? What are the odds that it will work - I read that they are reduced by 1/3. That's not great since our odds weren't exceptional to start with.

I am a bit of a control freak and it is frustrating not being able to control your own body. I actually felt better about this round because I knew what was happening and what to expect. But I also knew the different things that could go wrong. But I never would have imagined that I would grow a freakin fibroid! I mean c'mon, haven't we had enough roadblocks? This is not a good day. Sorry, hopefully Monday I will have more positive news.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Day 18

Today is my 18th day of shots - only 6 more days (hopefully) of my tummy shots, and then we get to move on to the "huge, Bobby has to give them to me in my hip because I can't reach" shots. I thought I was doing really well, because up until this week I hadn't bruised at all. But I should've knocked on wood because the bruises have started popping up and my stomach is starting to look like a mine field. I just bruise like a peach! Bobby said it looks better than last time, so that's good I guess. I wish I could say the shots are getting better. Last round, I was a pro and they didn't hurt - but this time they are really uncomfortable. I haven't had to use ice to numb the area yet, but I am considering it for tonight. First I have to find a spot that isn't bruised or near a bruise which may prove to be a challenge.

Today I had a dr. appointment in Spokane. Same old routine of getting up at 4:30 and heading out the door. My bloodwork and ultrasound looked good and Karen says I am right on track and to keep my meds the same. They want to see me back there on Saturday. I'm really glad I took 3 days off this week. I am way more relaxed this time around.

Oh, and I hate to say "I'm right", but well...I sort of am. Today there were only 2 husbands in the waiting room and the ladies were looking a little haggard. Ha! I don't mean to sound mean, but it's just kind of funny. I love to people watch and an IVF waiting room is a great place to do that.

Karen told me to keep taking it easy and to not take on any extra activities. We'll see if I can keep it up. I'm not really a "sit still" kind of person. Anyway, that's about it for today. I'm sorry there isn't a lot of new info. We are aiming for egg retrieval to happen on the 10th and then transfer sometime between the 13th and the 16th. Last time we were a day early for retrieval and a day late for transfer, so we'll see what happens this time.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

A-OK, so far

I had another appointment this morning. I left a little early because I was worried about the roads. Which was good, because although the roads were fine, there was really thick fog so it was slow-going. The last round, I didn't discover decaf coffee until the end, but this time it is my savior. I think I have actually convinced my brain that any kind of coffee will keep me alert. Also, I have decided to try once again to listen to my "learn Italian CD's", so we'll see how that goes. Il capisco umpo l'italiano! (I can understand a little Italian).

When I got to my appointment (at 6:55 am), I was the second person there. Score! They call you in the order that you arrive, so I knew my wait time wouldn't be very long. I'm glad I got there when I did because the waiting room filled up today. It must have been the start day for a lot of people.

There are some nice things about this being my second round. First, when I arrive, all I have to do is smile and wave at the front desk lady and she calls out "Hi Jennifer, I got ya down". It's nice to be known. Also, the phlebotomists and nurses all know me, so it's a familiar and relaxed feeling. The first time it was a lot of nerves.

I had to laugh today because there are two of us who are going through the second round. Everyone else must be new - and you can tell because they all brought their husbands and were practically giddy to be there. Heather (the other second rounder) and myself are dressed rather comfortably, hair in a respectable pony tail....the "first rounders" were all dressed up like they were going to a show.

I laugh for one, because that was me the first round. And secondly, because later this week (little do they know), they too will be sporting the sweatpants, or other similar comfy-wear, hair in pony tail and no husband in sight. Note to first rounders: it gets more uncomfortable, and I am sorry to say but the appointments will lose their luster for the man in your life since he doesn't get to go back with you and has to sit in the waiting room with 20 hormonal women. Note to first rounder husbands: treat the waiting room like a bus...if you are in a seat and there is said hormonal woman standing next to you - offer her your seat! 'nuf said about that.

Anywho, my appointment went well. Just a blood draw, which today I had the girl who is so much more gentle than the male phlebotomist. Thank goodness. And then I went to the waiting room and waited to be called for my ultrasound. Normally I only wait for a minute or two, but they must have been running behind because I waited for about 20 minutes. It didn't bother me too much because it allowed me some much anticipated reading time. (I learned early on to find a great book and only plan to read it at the Dr. office - it makes the time go by fast)

When I got called back for my ultrasound, I saw my nurse who always gives great hugs. I love it when she's the nurse that's there. Let me explain about the ultrasound. When I said in a previous post that they put you through like cattle, I was not exaggerating. This is what it's like:
There are 3 exam rooms. The middle room is the room with the Dr., a nurse and the ultrasound machine. The rooms on either side are the patient rooms. They take you to a room and tell you to remove clothing from the waist down and drape the little paper sheet over yourself. Then you wait for a knock on the door. When you hear the knock, you go into the room, quickly lay on the table, feet in stirrups. The doctor checks uterus, left ovary, right ovary, wam bam thank you mam, you're done. It is literally that fast. Then you get up and leave and as you close the door, you hear them knocking on the other door.
The thing that is most weird about it is that the person doing the ultrasound is your Dr. but you aren't really allowed to ask questions or anything because it's not an actual appointment, it's more of a "check" to see where you are at.

When everyone is gone, the Dr. and a team of nurses goes over everyone's results and makes a plan for the next day or two. Then the nurse calls. I was happy because I got the phone call at 10:30 today (last round my calls didn't come in until 3pm). Karen, my nurse, said everything was looking good. I have 4 follicles in my left ovary and about 8 in my right. My right ovary is always the stronger of the two. In case you are curious, the follicles, as I understand it, is where your eggs grow. So when they say you have a certain number of follicles, it doesn't necessarily mean you have that many eggs or even that the eggs will be mature.

Karen directed me to stay on my meds, same dosages, and for Bobby to continue taking his doxycyclene (an antibiotic) for the next 2 nights. I am to return for another appointment on Thursday. Hopefully the roads won't be icy, it's supposed to be pretty cold on Wednesday night.

On a funny side note. I haven't noticed too much irritability, but I am a little emotional. Not a "cry in my closet" emotional, but I did get a little teary eyed when I heard an On-Star commercial this morning. ha ha!