Monday, March 29, 2010

Last post...

Yep, you've read correctly. This will be my last post. Well, not last post ever...but my last post on the "Jennifer's IVF and Adventures in Pregnancy" blog. Since I am no longer going through IVF or pregnancy, I thought it appropriate to finish up this blog and start fresh. It's time to let go of my infertility and enjoy the wonderful blessings in my life. SO, I will be starting a new blog in the next week or so. I will of course put a link on this blog so anyone that wants to keep following the girls or just the Wilson family in general can get to the new blog and I will leave this blog up for awhile, so anyone going through IVF can read about my experience if they would like. Check back for that link :-)

I was trying to think of how to end this blog. I wish I was the kind of person who could sum all of my experiences up into a neat little package with parting words that are not only wise, but meaningful and touching...however, that's just not me. So here's what I want to say:

Infertility sucks! It sucks so bad that you can't possibly explain how badly it sucks. Only those who go through it can truly understand the turmoil it can bring to your life. It's been a long road that I hope to never travel again. I would like to say that it made me stronger and in some ways, maybe it did. But mostly it made me bitter (at times), heartbroken (at times) and eventually filled with joy at the final outcome.

We are coming to a point where we are going to need to decide what to do with our leftover embryos. We have 8. They are left from my second IVF cycle so this month they will have been stored for a year. What to do, what to do...I know this is controversial. Our options are to use them, donate to another couple, to dispose of them, or to possibly donate them to scientific research (although this option isn't available in some states and I am not to sure how this would work). We aren't sure what we are going to do and frankly, having the babies is still so new it seems premature to make such a big decision right now. SO, we are going to pay to store them one more year (a hefty price tag for that, I might add). This will give us some time to think about what we are going to do.

Also, I still have my "tub o fun" under my bathroom sink. There is nothing of value in this tub. Some expired meds, needles, alchohol swabs, etc. But for some reason, I can't bring myself to clean it out. What the heck am I holding onto? It's not like I'm a hoarder...you won't see me on some TLC show, but still...I just can't seem to bring myself to face that tub just yet. So, it looks like that will stay, as is, under my sink for awhile.

Do I still consider myself infertile even though I made it successfully through a pregnancy? You betcha. I wear my battle wounds with pride and will gladly talk to anyone about my experience with infertility. A pregnancy doesn't erase all that I have been through, even if it does lessen the sting a bit. It seems sort of fitting that it was 7 years ago in February that we started this whole thing and February is when our girls were born, ending it. 7 long years. Are we done having kids? I don't think so, but maybe. Will we try to get pregnant again? I don't think so, but maybe. Will we adopt again? It's always a possibility. As of right now, we are going to enjoy our kids and the life we have. Time will tell what happens beyond that.

So, for anyone that wants to follow the Wilson family, check back in the next week or so for the link to the new page (there will be an update on the girls and some pics). For those of you that are done following...thanks for the support and for always rooting for our success. We appreciate it :-)

Good-bye....

6 comments:

Domrese Family Blog said...

I can't wait for your new blog! I did the exact same thing!

As for storing the embryos. Wise choice. It's super hard to make that choice. Even though I KNEW 100% that we were done having kids, donating them to the couple we chose was one of the hardest choices I've ever made...no matter the choice, it's hard. I think storing them for a year is very very smart. Good thinking mama!

Infertile? Even after two rounds of twins I consider myself infertile. Hearing those callous remarks still sting. "I get pregnant just by being in the same room as my husband," and so on...ouch. And if Dan pats me just so on my behind...it stings....like it's still sore from injections. A bruising that might just never go away (whether in my heart or my body)

Nicole said...

I don't want you to close this blog down. It's been nice to go back and read your blog entries for the same amount of time I am along. Also, I like sneaking a peek at your belly to see how mine is doing. :)

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Kathleen Porter Kristiansen said...

Just checking out your blog today in 2014. Thanks for keeping it open.

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